Talking to Myself
Somehow it all seems the same, the more it changes. The buildings are in the same places and when they erect new ones they look like they’ve been there for ages. The color on them withers away and they paint it anew. Something bright or dark. It doesn’t matter. It will wither away too.
Just like scattered leaves in the wind, the people scatter about. From one place to another, each with their own drug whether it’s weed, alcohol, self-doubt, fitness or guilt. Throughout the years they have changed and yet they’re still the same. The faces wither away, lose their shine, but the habits never die.
Each one looks like they’re going on a destined path and at the same time, they’re sure that all their decisions are their own. But you can still tell where they’ll end up and who they’ll end up with. I’m no exception to the pattern of the paradox of existence. My face is young yet I’m old. Or at least older than I was. The beard’s there to remind me of the times when I didn’t have it.
I’m a young fool and a sage at the same time just as the person getting drunk in the nearest café is at the same time the coolest person in the room and his parents’ disappointment. He’s doomed to doom and dooms himself with every other glass, but at least that person’s free, right?
So, here I am. A rumbling buffoon that speaks as rarely as possible. How can we look different, talk different, walk different and do different things yet still look the same in some way? How can we know that someone before us didn’t have these exact thoughts I’m having now? Why do I feel different than the rest and my actions tell another tale?
More importantly, why I am talking to myself right now? Is just my brain jerking itself off because it’s bored or is it trying to reach an answer? Well, no answers so far, only questions. A skeptic am I, who yearns to live and is doomed to die. Just like the rest of us, although every fiber in my body swears I’m unique.
I guess that’s something to think about. The big minds can wrap their mind around this and come to a conclusion or another confusion. The small minds can try to understand it and then forget all about it, and those in between will leave it on seen.
To comprehend the uncomprehensive is to become like others, absorb their habits, just to see they weren’t that different from you. Well, it’s just a thought anyway.